malevolent_voices: (Default)
2013-01-27 05:49 pm

Whooooa, long time without a post!

So! Lots have things have changed in my life since my last post! LOTS of things!
My online-friends-met total currently stands at five, which is awesome! :D
I came out to my parents, which is awesome for one reason and has brought a baggage train of suck along with it as well. I'll get to that later.

Went to Australia, as most of you reading this no doubt know, to visit friends and relatives and stuff, Mum's shout. Which was good, seeing as I didn't have the money for it. At the same time, I also met up with Amy, Marcin and Jess, all of whom are just as awesome offline as online! Although Marcin doesn't pout nearly as much online. xD
We met up and had lunch and browsed shops and stuff a bit on one day, and on the second explored an interesting stage of the life cycle of the juvenile Australian Citizen on the other, following which we (again) had lunch and went to the beach. Where Amy and I built a sand castle in the shape of a penis while Marcin looked on horrified and Jess took a video, I think. Maybe. :p

That was all great, but then on the plane back yesterday Mum decided it would be a good time to talk about my sexuality with me, seeing as I couldn't escape. (And she wonders why I don't like talking to her much!) Anyway, the end result was that I found out that she's bi (apparently she knows this from what she called "first-hand experience", which was kinda mindblowing, considering she's my mum! xD) aaaand that she's outted me to Dad after I specifically asked her not to as I wasn't ready for him to know yet. At least he's cool with it.
By "it" I mean the fact that I also like boys. They know I'm transgendered, but they seem to want to persuade me out of it from what Mum's said so far. Which doesn't sound fun! But we haven't talked about it in any great depth yet, so I don't know exactly where they're planning to make their joint stand on that issue.

What Mum did take exception to was the fact that I was scared of her response and hid it from her - that, combined with every other thing I've ever hidden from her because I was scared of her response, has led her to declare that I'm unworthy of her trust (she's done this every time I've hidden from her so far, with worse consequences every time...) and that she doesn't feel that she can support me.
Add this to the one-credit-short fiasco from early January and she's decided it's not worth supporting me through university because she thinks the money would be a waste.
She has also accused me of constantly asking her for hand-outs, which is a lie. Considering that I was planning on getting through university without even thinking for a second that she was going to give me any money for it. Which is probably a good thing, seeing as she's not!

So basically, Australia was a brief reprieve before I get pushed into whatever-it-is Mum's decided would be the best path for me. She's also started asking me how I plan to pay back money for various things that I'd actually been told I didn't have to pay her back for! Which is nice.

All this combined has made me decide that it's probably better to go back to my initial plan... Which is to get a fulltime job for the year, if possible, and raise money to get into university next year as well as pay Mum back. My scholarship is valid for two years so it does work out, although I would have preferred to go to university this year.
I also need to move out. Not want, need. Because I really want to punch Mum in the face pretty much every time I see her looming in my doorway like some kind of bitchy harbinger of debt and depression. :/

So, I need to find a job and I need to find a place to live! But in the meantime I'm also going to try and persuade my school to let me try for the extra credit I missed next year, because then I can add being literate to my CV. Which would be nice!
Finding a job may be a bit problematic seeing as my interests in terms of jobs lie mainly in IT and I don't actually have any formal qualifications, seeing as I never took any IT. So, also on the list are free basic IT certification courses! If I have to get a department store job to survive, though, I will and I'll be happy about it.
Preferably I want a job at which I can transition socially to female, but NZ law says that as a trans person I do have to be given equal employment opportunities, so I guess it'll be okay most places??

But yeah, that's what life is being for me at the moment. While some of it sucks a lot, it is actually an opportunity I can use to get out of the same old cycle that I'm currently stuck in, so I guess that's good!
My life isn't the best, it isn't the worst, but I can definitely take it better places. Even if I do take more than two years before I go to university and lose out on the scholarship, if by that time I'm on the track I want to be? That's worth $2000 to me.

So in the end, I'm sitting in a place in between "WELL FUCK EVERYTHING" and "LIFE IS GOOD, LIFE IS GREAT 8D". Hopefully it heads more towards the latter. :p


I may make another post later if I've missed anything of importance, but I just wanted to share that with people!

malevolent_voices: (Default)
2012-03-03 08:57 pm

My view on robot sex slaves

 I'm a geek, yes. I build computers and robots, I carry a laptop around with me full time. I had a USB drive in my pocket when I went to a school social once.

For some reason this has made a large number of the guys at school come up to me and ask "Would you have sex with a robot?" or "Are you going to make an army of robot sex slaves for yourself?"
I'm not sure what answer they're expecting, but I usually just answer "No."

But I got kind of annoyed at being asked this so often so the last person to ask me that got a good five minute lecture actually explaining to him my reasoning for those answers and why I think that robot sex slaves are actually going to become an unfortunate reality at some point in the near future. 
This is some of what I said, if anyone's interested.
Read more... )

So, that's my view on this. What's yours?

malevolent_voices: (Default)
2012-02-18 09:52 pm

Friday! But not because this is Saturday!

 Today was mixed for me. I had a lot of fun during it, but towards the end I started getting rather down because what's been practically my only out-of-school social activity (such as it was) is cancelled indefinitely for me. Rather, it's been moved to Saturday afternoons from Friday nights, which doesn't work for me because I've got no reliable transport on Saturdays. So, yeah, there was that.
Thomas also somehow won tickets to the new Pokémon movie so I'm going to see that tomorrow with him and our other friend, Peter!
Also, in Classics my teacher commented that there are other plays than those by Aristophanes that he would like to teach, but NZQA won't let him because they are "too adult". So instead, we have Philocleon (with his donkey fetish), a bunch of democratic prostitutes, Philoxenus, a couple of slaves and Bdelycleon the argumentative party animal to give not-so-subtle commentary on how Cleon was a really bad leader to have when the Spartans were about to invade. And make dick jokes the whole way through.

Anyway! The Argentina trip is coming up soon - end of March! - so we have been practicing the haka (a traditional... war dance, I suppose? that the Maori do to impress each other when they go to visit other tribes) and learning various songs to sing to the Argentinians we'll be visiting. And there will be a blog, which I am in charge of, so I will link to that at some point! (Also Kelly if you're reading this, are you able to set up wordpress on a subdomain called argentina for me? I was going to call you about it earlier but hey!)

I've also been reading 1984 again and am again finding the parallels between Orwell's guesses and what's actually happening now rather creepy. I might write more about this later when I've got to the end of it again.

My only other piece of... news is that I may or may not have accidentally signed up to be the singer for some covers of Jethro Tull songs. This may or may not come up later. XD

That's all, folks!

... or rather, that was all, folks! Because I wasn't actually able to post this last night you now get tacked-on complaint about how I never actually get to post anything on Friday anyway. XD
Also, the Mario Bros. vs the Wright Brothers. Worth listening to!
And this being Saturday evening, I have been to see the Pokemon movie. It was basically a laugh-fest most of the way through, though Victini genuinely moved me and the end song and opening song were both really cool. I recommend that you guys watch it if you can!

Aaaand I've been given an accidental warning that the net's going soon, so this is getting posted immediately after I finish this sentence and type XD. XD

EDIT: This is a school haka here. Whoever uploaded it displays the standard Year 11 Maori mentality towards competition. They were also from Tait house. XD
I'm on the back right of the house with all the Maoris.

malevolent_voices: (Default)
2012-02-13 08:40 pm

Extra, Extra! Philocleon's donkey proclivities confirmed! Mia makes the bus on time! And more!

So today I made the bus on time (:D!) and also didn't get detention for the other times I missed the bus (8D)!

This is due to a mishap in the school filing system that had them put me down as having an explained absence for Thursday, thereby enabling me to use my undated note for Thursday to cover Friday instead, even though Dad had decided not to give me a note for that. XD

I've found that for the first two weeks of school I've been able to evade the not-being-online-except-Fridays rule because I've had very little homework and have completed all of that along with additional study, though I don't know how long that'll last. I will make the most of it while it lasts, though!


Extra, Extra! A cut! )


Still not sure how I got from one topic to the other, but hey! Enjoy!

Also I've been listening to a lot of this guy's ukulele covers of things and am really liking him!
malevolent_voices: (Default)
2012-02-11 08:44 pm

Philocleon and the Donkey

If you look at the tags and still want to read this (and probably you will because it's not that bad or anything!) then ;D to you! In all seriousness, I'm basically putting it under one of these because it's not important and because revolves around a hyper-masculine old person clinging to the underside of a donkey. :P